𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒂 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒔𝒌𝒚 ✨

Saturday, February 09, 2013, 12:34 am ·
In my mind's eye, this is all I see

credit: respective owners

I cannot believe Im revelling in the pain that returned. and it's all in my head. and feet. well, most prominently in my feet. the head.. well, no one believes me anymore. HAHAAAR~ Go Figure! so the visit to the skin pros today proved to be a senseless pleasure. two reasons: one, I am perfectly alright. two, doctor was very, v-e-r-y kind. the thought about having to practice the double socking method is adorable~ the bills, though I was the one who paid, proved to be of the least concern to me. I dont care about the bills I just want my feet back.

OH Im beginning to feel the itch for arts fartsies again. a lot of things have been going on in my head. I need to release. and it will all begin with pen and paper. for the past couple of days now, my tolerance and patience for the world and the people have dropped to a miraculous impossible state. it's dropped so much that I realized Im slowly becoming like them. oh the self-pitying.. but it will all go away easily now because degrading in minds to such a level has taught me a very powerful tool of defence especially for myself; SELFISHNESS. //throws confetti and poppers//

I think about you every day. and night. It gets crazier and crazier and ridiculous and then I will just go soft and think, well, this is just it. this, alone, is just wonderful. I'll keep you in my head for a little longer. (:

I NEED TO TEH. AND I NEED MY LIFE BACK. this will soon prove to become a living reality in a week's time. Yay!

Labels: fuck, medication mathematician, midnight, pain is only temporary, why am I not at ease

Monday, June 18, 2012, 12:55 am ·
space #8

The window suddenly opens. It creaked, and at once I was stunned. The sheer coldness of the wind at night was not to my understanding — how can something transparent and light as air cut through my skin? I slithered towards the window, afraid of another attack.

A hand gently grasped mine as I peeked out below. The contact sent sparks of ice up to my brain. I doubled back, but never retreated. I waited for the truth to come up and face me, and there he was.
He stood like the darkness in summer. His eyes, soft like wintered snowflakes. The sharp gaze met mine and I choked on my own breath. His lifeless arms suddenly reached forth, gesturing that I come nearer. Time seemed to have slowed down for too long — suddenly crashes of the crowd right outside my door are heard.

No more, I dont want to be suppressed no more.

I turned towards the man at the window, clasped his hand, and we left on what seemed like a flying skateboard. Hilarious, but gracious regardless. He pressed me towards him as we landed behind a couple of nearby cars. Astounded by his great warmth, dumbfounded in all that was happening, I was torpid in acknowledging the presence of all seven of them. Each took their turn to ruffle my hair in greeting, and I flushed with every chimerical contact. The reverie didnt last long. The rampage from home has been going on for the last hour or so. It was really hard to swallow, the fear from before.

I glanced back up to my room on the ninth floor one last time before we left in such haste. I wasn't sure if this was something I would not see to regret in future, though this was the least of my worries. What's keeping me constantly occupied in my own head is the fact that my heart and body are not in sync, for I was holding one's hand tightly while leaning into the arms of another. Ridiculous. Something only fairy tales can fetch is half of a reality in mine.

Yet, the only one who could affect me as much as death does is not even within the proximity. He is the very source of this war, the reason for my mental fiasco.

Labels: fah_fiction, happy, midnight, nightmare song

Wednesday, June 13, 2012, 1:43 am ·
hello new skin in mid-june!

CELEBRATE THE NEW LAYOUT TEMPLATEEE

+ I really need new sets of normal and sports bra T_T

Meh.

Labels: happy, inspirations, midnight, new skin, sleep