going over the tip to overcome and conquer that stagnant state is as difficult as making the first move the first time. it's a plateau im experiencing in both my weight/excess fat loss and my relationship with my partner.

i. the excess fat loss has stopped; i have to take extra measures to amp up my efforts to maintain a consistent loss. I know I need to keep to my intermittent fasting more actively as well as to be consistent in my exercise. Procrastinating my yoga and not doing it everyday when I told myself I would is one of the reasons why Im 'failing' so I shouldnt complain. Just have to keep doing it, not as a chore but as a distraction...

ii. the feelings I have are still here, but there's a painful parry initiated by nervous thoughts whenever I think of Pang. it's uncomfortable, and i fear I might have to talk to him about it. its even more fearful when I think that it might even lead to a sort of confrontation. im not sure why and when this fear crept its way up, but it's very unsettling. the only assurance I have is that this plateau will be a first for me.. However, I cant say the same for him.

obviously things have fallen into a certain routine, a stagnant pool of habits, so there might be that bit where I might be taking things for granted? I know what can make me move, what can make things better: add a little fun. while that is a sure-fire way to amp things up for myself, it's not always the easiest. I've to remember to keep myself distracted from the unnecessary thoughts, and just do me. Things shifted, and now they're settled. it's time to shift again so that I can progress further to better myself.

Labels: it's so hard to express this shit in words, let us just go to a place, pang the popiah, well now, word vomit

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